This one kinda got away from me. Again. This is another folktale with a hockey spin, but instead of coming up with new names, I just used the players' actual names because I used more characters this time around.
This storytelling is a revamp of "Coyote and the Mesquite Beans" from the California and the Old Southwest unit. In the story, Coyote knows that it is bad luck to eat anything that survived the flood - this includes Mesquite beans and black bugs. Well, he eats both and then dies.
Since this legend is one from the Pima people of Arizona, and Arizona has a hockey team called the Coyotes - I couldn't resist. I tried. I failed. I'm so (kinda) sorry. What I changed is that Shane Doan eats some mesquite beans and then turns into a coyote. Three of his teammates then scramble to try to find out what's going on and how to fix Doan by using the NHL phone tree. Pictures of those featured on the phone tree are at the bottom.
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| Shane Doan, captain of the Arizona Coyotes, and a coyote |
Siri, my captain's been turned into a coyote - please send help!
“This isn’t normal, right?” Mikkel Boedker asks, his eyes immediately darting to Oliver Ekman-Larsson – who was staring wide-eyed at Shane.
“What makes you think I know?” Oliver snaps, finally looking away from Shane to glare at Mikkel. Then he turns to Steve Downie and asks, “Is this normal?”
Steve shifts in his stall, looking around the rest of the locker room and obviously wishing that he hadn’t decided to stay behind after practice. It was just Steve, the two Scandinavians, and their captain.
Who was currently a coyote. A very angry looking coyote.
“My, what big teeth you have,” Steve says, the words coming out before he could stop them.
Coyote Shane’s ears flattened against the back of his skull and he lowered his head closer to the floor – looking about ready to lunge at Steve.
“Personally, I’ve never seen this,” Steve says, ignoring Shane with faked nonchalance, “but I can make some calls.”
“Who can you even call about this?” Mikkel asks.
“The one person who has connections to every single player in the League,” Steve answers easily, putting his phone to his ear. He listens for a beat, before he smiles and says, “Hey, Sidney. You’re not going to believe this shit.”
-
“He’s what?” Sidney Crosby, captain of the Penguins, asks, eyebrows furrowing as he stops in his tracks, making Pens goalie Marc-Andre Fleury collide into his back. Fleury, also called Flower, began to protest – but Sidney quickly shushed him. “Say that again, Downs, because—just, what?”
Flower leans in closer, trying to listen to what was being said – it must be interesting if Steve Downie had reached out for the first time since his signing with Arizona. He hears Steve’s voice, lisp worsened slightly by his excitement: “Shane Doan just turned into a fuckin’ coyote and I’ve got two rookies panicking over here.”
Flower immediately pulls back and shares a look with Sidney. “He should call Carey Price,” Flower suggests.
Sidney raises an eyebrow even as Steve’s loud guffaw comes through the phone’s speaker. It was well known that Steve Downie and the goalies of the NHL were not on good terms. Not because he had done anything to them, but because he was prone to taking out their defensemen – opening the way up for his own forwards to score.
“Okay,” Flower amends, “then you can call Carey Price.”
“I’ll call you back, Steve,” Sidney says, then after goodbyes are shared, he hangs up and goes to his contacts list.
-
Carey Price, goalie extraordinaire for the Montreal Canadiens, absolutely does not laugh Sidney Crosby off the phone.
But that's only because PK Subban, defensemen extraordinaire for the Canadiens, takes the phone away from Carey. “Steve Downie turned who into a what?” he asks.
(In Pittsburgh, Sidney rolls his eyes.)
“No,” Sidney says, his voice suddenly booming as PK puts him on speaker phone, setting the phone between himself and Carey on Carey’s dining room table where they had been eating their post-practice meal. “Shane Doan has somehow been turned into a coyote. Downs is the one who called me.”
“I don’t know what’s going on,” Carey says, taking a swig of water. “But you should call Lu – he got turned into an orca once because he violated one of the First Nation’s laws. I’m not sure which one, though.”
“How does that even happen?” Sidney asks, dumbfounded.
“He did some shit he wasn’t supposed to, obviously,” Carey answers.
“Okay, but what—” Sidney voice is abruptly cut off when Carey disconnects the call.
-
“I don’t what Price is talking about,” Roberto Luongo snarls in a way that Sidney knows means that he’s lying. “Talk to Eddie.”
And then Luongo disconnects the call.
-
“Clearly this is magic,” Eddie Lack says after he’s listened to Sidney’s entire story. “Just like Carey has said.”
“We know that,” Sidney says. “What we don’t know is how to fix it.”
“It will probably fix itself,” Eddie says. “Lu swam around in the ocean for a few hours before he turned back into himself. Luckily, he stayed close to shore, so he didn’t have to swim very far.”
“So they should just keep an eye on him?”
“Yes,” Eddie says, sounding exasperated.
-
“I don’t know if I’d trust anything Eddie Lack says, he’s always had a few screws loose,” Steve says. He and the two rookies had managed to secret their transformed captain out of the arena and into Steve’s truck (Shane had claimed the front seat and bared his fangs at Oliver and Mikkel until they had climbed into the backseats).
“Well, he’s the best lead you have right now,” Sidney says.
-
Later that night, after they’ve all settled in at Oliver and Mikkel’s house, it’s Oliver who puts everything together.
“Hey, Shane,” Oliver starts, waiting until he has Shane’s attention. “Have you eaten any mesquite beans recently?” After getting looks from his teammates, he elaborates: “According to the Pima people, eating mesquite beans is bad luck. Actually, eating anything that survived the great flood is bad luck and can kill you. There’s a legend that Coyote did it once and he died.”
Coyote Shane’s ears swivel from being forward, to being flat – his features tinged with panic.
Oliver is quick to backtrack. “I’m not saying you’ll die,” he says.
“Okay, but how do we fix him?” Steve asks.
Before Oliver could answer, there was a yelp and a ripping sound – and then Shane is standing there – fully human.
“That answers that question,” Shane says.
Mikkel and Oliver whoop, while Steve picks up his phone and shoots Sidney a text: He’s back :)
-z-
End.
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| Mikkel Boedker and Oliver Ekman-Larsson |
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| Steve Downie |
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| Marc-Andre "Flower" Fluery and Sidney Crosby |
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| Carey Price and PK Subban |
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| Eddie Lack and Roberto Luongo |
Bibliography: Myths and Legends of California and the Old Southwest by Katharine Berry Judson (1912).
Hi Kirsten,
ReplyDeleteI really liked that you put your author’s note at the top of the post. It was a really nice way to preface your story! I also really liked that you put not only a modern day spin on the story, but you also included hockey in it. That’s very creative! Honestly, I laughed a lot while reading this. I am somewhat familiar with hockey, so I recognize most of the players you included. The dialogue you used really made the story for me. Overall, you did great!
Hey Kirsten! I agree that starting the story with the author's note keeps people from being confused until the end of the story. It makes everything clear and upfront. I loved the Little Red Riding Hood reference! I like that you combine your stories with hockey. I think it always makes it interesting. I enjoyed reading your story and I keep coming back for more each week!
ReplyDeleteHi Kirsten! Even though we aren't in the same group this week, I decided that for the extra credit with blog commenting that I would come back and revisit your blog! So hello again! I was keeping my fingers crossed that you would use the essential theme of hockey to tell a story once more, which you did. Like previous comments have stated, I do like how you had the author's note at the start of your post. I have not read this tale, so it was good to know about the Pima people and how eating anything that survived the great flood is bad juju. I know you apologized at the beginning of the post, but I was hoping to see something really cool have to happen to our dear coyote to transform back into a hockey player. Maybe a quest or something. But overall, I think you did a good job making this story your own.
ReplyDeleteThis was a great story to read. I laughed out loud when Steve said, “My, what big teeth you have.” That was the best part of the story I liked. The dialogue in your story is brilliant and hilarious. Your story was spaced out and clear to read. I love it how you changed the characters to professional hockey players. It was really cool how you connected the hockey team with the coyote from the original story as well as both of them being from Arizona. This was an enjoyable story to read and quite funny too.
ReplyDelete